I love it when I am having a random conversation with someone and a great blog idea comes out of it. I think I appreciate it so much because it truly makes the idea authentic, rather than forced, and I believe I can write with way more conviction.
Anyway, I was standing out on a lacrosse field in the freezing (literally) cold talking to another mom who was sacrificing her Saturday for the sake of her son’s sport career (a little sarcasm intended). Our conversation started out pretty simply, as we don’t know each other well, and by the time we both walked back to our cars to thaw out an hour later, I was full of thoughts and ideas about what we discussed.
The one aspect that stands out the most to me is about how it’s okay to let go of the idea that everything needs to be perfect all the time. We agreed that a nice polish to your life can be just as effective.
Shiny or flawless?
What do I mean by polish? Let me share the examples we talked about. She told me that she always tries to make sure that a decent dinner is available for her family. She doesn’t have time to cook a gourmet meal every night, but she tries to make sure it’s healthy and includes the important stuff.
We talked about making sure that our kids had clothes that fit. It was a little random, but such a great example. Maybe they don’t always match, and I for sure know that my kids walk out of the house with wrinkles in their clothes, but the clothes are clean, they fit, and for the most part (except the shorts in 20 degree weather) are appropriate for where they are going.
Perfect? No, but totally good enough.
Another part of our conversation was about our kids reaching their potential and doing their personal best to make it happen. We agreed that in life, it’s really all you should expect from yourself and from others. There’s so much emphasis placed on being the best (especially where I live) that we all (kids and parents) often lose sight of the growth and positive things our kids are experiencing because we get caught up in someone else’s perception of what is the “right” and “best” way to do something.
I often remind my kids that it’s okay to mess up, and that I don’t expect them to be perfect. I just want them to do their best, always. I want them to polish their skills and be all they can be. I know only positive things will come from this.
Doing the best we can
I don’t know about you but I’m busy. Most people I know are also busy and doing what they can to make their lives run successfully. What “successful” means is defined differently to each of us, and that’s the way it should be. I have friends whose kids look like they just stepped out of an Abercrombie ad…always.
I have other friends who make Beef Wellington on a Wednesday. In my world, those things don’t happen. I’m happy if my son’s socks match and if dinner didn’t happen simply because I picked up a phone and a take-out menu. If you’ve been reading my blogs and have gotten to know me a little, you might know that none of this comes easy for me either.
I, on occasion, have some “perfectionist” tendencies that I have to work through. I am working on them though, always reminding myself and my family to just do the best we can…we are going for polish, not perfection, these days and everyone is much happier as a result.