My tennis lesson yesterday was intense, and by intense, I mean I spent a lot of the hour and a half getting the ball slammed at me during a “put away” drill. Part of that had to do with the nature of the drill we were doing, and the other part was because the ladies on the other side of the net can bring the heat.
Regardless, I walked away with sore shoulders, good strategic advice and a great blog idea. My instructor, JK, was talking about the importance of touch: when it helps to have a soft touch and when it works better to fire away. He said that in the real world it helped to have both. He was referring to the real world of tennis, but I couldn’t agree more.
You can use my tennis analogy anyway you want and fit it into your own life. Do you have a good touch?
It depends on the situation
In reference to the drill I mentioned above, I had a hard time getting it right and it took me way too many attempts before I was able to get my mind and racquet to agree that I really didn’t need to hit the ball as hard as I could to win the point. I can really hit a hard shot when I want to and, yesterday, I wanted to.
Sometimes it feels great to wind up and let it go. If nothing else, it can feel therapeutic. Unfortunately, many of those balls I was so eager to slam, landed somewhere in the next county and did not help me win any points. It was frustrating to say the least. I got better as the “tennis” lesson went on, but I really couldn’t get the “life” lesson I was thinking about out of my head. JK was right; in life (real or tennis), you really need to have both a soft touch and a hard touch to be successful. The tricky part is knowing when to use which.
Analyze the situation and it will become clearer
I was seriously feeling like I was a total beginner tennis player because I couldn’t get it right. Because of this, I began a mini-downward spiral of confidence. My game got worse. About halfway through the drill, I pulled myself together and started to focus on my ball placement. I made decisions depending on what type of feed came at me, and where my opponents were on the court. I made adjustments. I dropped a few soft balls over the net, I used some really good angles and I also still hit the ball hard. I began to win points. My confidence grew and I really saw how using the right “touch” at the right time worked in my favor.
Off the court
How many times have we (you too) yelled, when asking nicely would have worked just as well or better? How many times have you not spoken up and gotten the short end of the stick as a result? It’s tricky, I know. People are often turned off by others who are pushy, loud and always have a “hard touch”. Conversely, some people are turned off by others who are doormats, meek and who are “soft”. Personally, I think there’s room in everyone’s life to use both touches. There are times to stamp your foot and demand something, and there are times when being patient is more beneficial.
My advice, keep your eye on the ball, eventually you’ll be able to figure it out and hit a winner.
Image credit: Basheer Tome
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